A completely new race for several reasons: First, 11-hour time jet leg; we got there on Saturday afternoon, just Sunday to recover and then immediately workouts and races! Second, I had to handle this race very lonely, I was the only girl to do only my specialty. So I moments to be shared only with myself, it was more boring than other years, but definitely more intense.
The opponents every year were more and more strong … I never underestimate my opponents, the race is race, and in a sport like mine, where you give everything only in 3 minutes, sometimes even less, you cannot allow yourself to take things for granted !
I was confident, however, a voice inside me kept saying that everything would be okay, that I would make it, that was fine.

Just before the race I usually experience ‘the feeling of wanting to escape” from the situation. In better words, even thought I am happy to be there, the pre-race moments use to be that stressful that sometimes there’s a part of me saying, “but what the hell I’m doing here?”  This year, however, just the night before the race I had a very significant dream. I dreamed that a friend of mine in the national team offered me to return to Italy because he was sick of staying there and I replied, “Why not? Let’s go!” Once at home with my dad and my brother, who had welcomed me, my house had changed, it was more beautiful perhaps, but after a while ‘I realized that I was more hurt at home, that was not my place at that time. My brother told me: “what are you doing here? Why did you come back? And now what are you telling the staff?”

I was getting worse, I was anxious, I saw Auckland and New Zealand as a wonder … and me at home … What was I doing ?! I wanted to teleportation to be there in a flash! … … I suddenly woke up and I checked to be actually in the bed of Auckland. Once awake my anxiety vanished completely, I quickly realized it was a dream that had released something from me.
That “something” was the very fear that often comes over me before the races, the fear to enter and the desire (unconscious) to escape. This time it did not have this uncomfortable feeling, I was totally focused on myself and I wanted to be there in that very moment, without the fear of entering.
When you’re in a situation of “danger”, a series of thoughts and anxieties trigger into you without realizing it, and the really hard fact is to be able to overcome all these fears that come up as if you uncorked a bottle of sparkling wine .

It was the first time I could face the compulsory dances really serene, in fact, as it happens, I was already in first place after this part of the race.
In any other world competitions I used to be in second or third place after the compulsory dances, this was the first time.
The next day there was the Free … I had a great program, Carmen, being first was a wonderful feeling but completely new. This time I did not have to recover anything, I was already there, I had “only” to do well and maintain the position.
The race was approaching, it was time to warm up, my Carmen dress was hanging in the locker room; that dress was gorgeous, wearing it you must enter into the character. I obviously did a search on the opera, I went to see it, I inquired about the characteristics of the gypsy. She is a poor woman but absolutely intriguing and seductive, so powerful that that she was able to go to the heart of every person she met and Don José fell that crazy that could do anything else to manage but killing her. It is a woman of strong character and I felt close to her in so many aspects.

But that day I could not get into the character, I felt the pushing of the race but I could not feel myself. I did the official test track at the minimum of my abilities, I was not satisfied and Sandro, my choreographer, said, “Paola, what’s happening?” Me: “I ​​cannot get into character!” S. : “it is not true, you’re in it!” I looked at him strangely … “You are Carmen, remember who you are, a gypsy who seduces even with the look, she is so determined in her choices to take them till the end, till her death. She loves with her whole being, but she wants to maintain her freedom too… You are like that too… think about it! ”

I began to recognize the character, I felt it more and more. ” Now you’re in it, I see it … and remember, the jury is Don José, Seduce it! “ It was up to me, and my mom before entering said,” Between Paola and Carmen, Carmen must win! ” Only then I realized that Paola and Carmen were the same thing, the same person, the same character: “I’m Carmen!” I said as I entered the track. The time had come, I often put myself so much in what I’m doing to get into a state of trans.

I came down without really realizing what had happened … Well I imagined, but it is really hard to understand at that moment, I just knew that once again the magic of the race took shape, once again I removed the mask of my daily life as Paola to release a brand new one, a Paola that I really show out only on the track.
Everyone tells me in fact that I really change when I’m on the track, and this happens to me because at that time there are no judgments, no rules, no feelings of guilt or frustration … getting on track is freedom, a way to reach an “I” totally pure . There I bring my life, freed from unnecessary, there I find really my essence.

I live my PASSION.

Auckland, 2012